“I can’t afford a gym membership, I can’t exercise, I’ll never lose weight :((((“

renegadesoul:

117lbs:

15poundstosummer:

BITCHES DONT NEED GYM MEMBERSHIPS

BITCHES GET THINGS DONE 

Ten ways to burn calories without going to the gym: 

  1. Chase a sibling around yelling “IMA KILL YOU” for at least ten minutes or until the neighbors get alarmed.
  2. Jump on a trampoline and pretend you’re Harry Potter being blasted backwards by magical spells
  3. Throw a private dance party in your room and make everyone aware that it is quite exclusive and you are the only one sexy enough to attend
  4. Go to your local grocery store, fill your cart with heavy items and push the cart wildly around, riding it as though you are on a scooter. Once the manager tries to kick you out, try and run away with the cart. 
  5. Run three laps around your neighborhood screaming “THE APOCALYPSE IS COMING”
  6. Fill balloons with water and throw them at your neighbors cat that eats all the squirrels. Arm workout from throwing the balloons, cardio from running like a motherfucker away from the cat. 
  7. Climb trees and act as though you are a pirate on a mast, yelling AHOY MATEY at everyone passing below. 
  8. Practice your ninja moves and stealthily creep around your house
  9. Color your entire driveway pink with sidewalk chalk
  10. Army roll all around your yard yelling “IM A LOG AND DONT TRY AND STOP ME” 

oh my god

I’m going to do that now ^

the last one is just

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  11. believe-in-something-beautiful reblogged this from jennalee-weightloss and added:
    OMG LMAO I’M TRYING THESE
  12. fuckbitchsloseweight reblogged this from lets-not-weight and added:
    this is great ^__^
  13. ready-for-skinny reblogged this from fattygirldiet
  14. fattygirldiet reblogged this from the-happy-way and added:
    Paha must try a few of these.
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    TOTALLY DOING THESE
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